I’m not going to lie. I’m in love. This weekend, I couldn’t stop thinking about her. COULD NOT. I had a dream about vampires last night and she was in it. I am crazy. I’m going to have to move away to shake it. This shouldn’t be happening, but it is. I could just start poking girls on Facebook like Michelle suggests and see what happens. I could just go out and meet some more girls. That won’t solve anything. That’s no cure for love. Love is not a sickness. I wish I could embrace it.

At least I have family to help me. Kirsten’s kids are awesome. I spent Friday and Saturday with them. We watched Meet the Robinsons last night. It’s about a super smart orphan who longs to meet his real mother, yet is waiting to be adopted by a family. It’s cute. After the kids went to bed, KT and I watched Epic Movie. It was mediocre at best.

In the morning, we took the kids to their soccer game. It was fun. I was taking shots off the little one and trying to get the older one to focus on his dribbling. Controlling the ball is a big thing in soccer.

Kirsten and I got to talking about “control.” I was controlled by my mother most of my life, so I finally got a taste of freedom and loved it. She yelled at me yesterday (about my life and my future). I told her about what happened between me and the last one. She told me it was hard for her as a single mom. We always came first in her life. I hate to admit it, but she’s right. My child would always come first. I couldn’t image the personal sacrifice… but I understand. You gotta be able to stand up for yourself and be happy to move on. I can’t believe I’m still stuck, but I guess that’s love. Time is irrelevant.

We went to see Bee Movie today. It was pretty funny. Wacky, yet slightly odd. I feel like this is turning into a Live Journal post. I miss the kids already. I’m going to have kids some day. Just gotta seal the deal. I’m probably just holding on to false hope, but it’s the only hope I’ve got these days. At this point, I know it’s impossible. At least I have kids who look up to me and little minds to shape.

KT has to tell Eddie like it is. 9 AM youth soccer pwns.